Skip to main content

The Big Purge of 2010

Lately I’ve been consumed with The Big Purge. I’ve let things pile up in our basement, and a recent episode of Hoarders got my attention…..Our basement could have been featured on that show. Yikes.


People are generous. Over the years, good neighbors have seen our big family and have wanted to donate to us. Suddenly we’ll look outside and our neighbor has tossed something over his fence into our yard as a gift to our family. We’ve received everything from small sized swimming pools to entertainment centers from our neighbors. Our fellow church goers too, have given unexpected trucks, dolls and cradles for the kids. Factor in a few years of birthdays, Christmases, Easters and all the rest and it becomes out of control. If I am not diligent, these things pile up as they end up becoming more than what our five children can possibly play with in the course of a day.

We are grateful for these generous donations to our cause. We really are. But too much is too much.

Ever feeling the need to teach the cold hard truth of materialism, I found that I wasn’t listening to my own wisdom. The basement became a maze to walk through to simply make it to our deep freezer. Boxes and bins of seemingly necessary things were causing a serious disturbance in my peace. I couldn’t walk down there. I just couldn’t look at the disaster awaiting me.

And then, HH and I decided on a Big Purge. Perhaps, just perhaps letting these things go, can create enough space down in the basement to put carpet down, keep toys down there and have a nice play spot for the children, even let their friends come over and have a place to be together.

To Purge Is To Learn.

In letting these things go, I began to realize the attachments we have to material things sometimes. At times we tie ourselves to our things; we tie ourselves to our belongings, even if they are buried in boxes in the basement. Knowing they are there gives us comfort or security. In letting so much go, in breaking that need for stuff, I find that I can live in the here and now, and not in a possible ‘what if’ future. A future, that might come, that might not come. It’s living in possibilities, not in reality. And there IS a difference. I could hold on to so much of what we have down there for a ‘what if’ type of future….and then the play area for the children is no longer a reality, because I am forever waiting for a future to happen.

Now that I am getting better at letting things go, I found a great liberating peace about the whole thing. What used to tie me down, these things, now only re-enforce what I know to be true, that these things, these pieces are of a past or of a possible future, but they are not of us in the here and now. I learned that my security isn’t in these things of the past, it lies in my present, it lies in my role as mom, it lies in my role as wife, that’s in the here and now….that’s in the present of our life. And that present, that slice of time, is a gift. And I am taking that slice, that piece of the gift, and embracing it. It’s a freedom like I’ve not felt in a long time. And I’ll let you why…


HH asked me a question, as I pushed yet another bin aside for an upcoming garage sale, “Honey, perhaps we should keep a few of these things just in case. Don’t go crazy here.”

I took a long moment. Was I being rash?

Finally I looked at him, and with a true sense of peace, I told him, “This is an act of trust.”

His confused look prompted me to go on, “Honey, I am trusting that God will provide what we need for our future. I can only prepare my heart and soul for that future, not a house full of stuff, not anymore.” I tried to explain that the need had been broken….the need for things to feel secure, had been torn down and to keep a thing here or there, these useless items for a ‘just in case’ future, was only prolonging the problem. A clean break is what was needed. A complete letting go, no jagged edges, no torn pieces, no crumbs…..a quick, and decisive cut like a swift swing of a sharp knife is what has given so much peace and freedom. To go back is impossible now.

Lately we’ve been watching the 'Little House on the Prairie' series. Other than creating a deep urge in me to bake bread, it’s also been a great time to discuss the early settlers and the challenges they must have faced in the founding of our country. It has become also a time to discuss the difference between ‘want’ and ‘need’. The Ingalls had so little, and yet, were so happy. …and I get it now. I understand that there is a happiness that comes from a freedom from materialism. They had what they needed, and it was enough, because they knew what truly mattered wasn’t a new church dress, or several being stored for later, it was each other, and the work they did for one another as their God given vocation.

I’ve learned it’s not what they wear, it’s who is wearing it.

I’ve learned it’s not what I bake it in, as long as I take the time to bake.

I’ve learned it’s not about how many toys, but if I’ve taught them to share what they own.

I’ve learned it’s not about how many shoes they have, but if their steps are guided in the right direction.

I’ve learned it’s not about memories tied up in baby clothes, I've got memories etched forever in my mind.

I’ve learned it’s not about shelves I’ll never hang, but it’s teaching my children how to build, paint and create something from nothing.

I’ve learned it’s not about how many different styles of coats, just if we are praying for those without.

I’ve learned it’s not about how many different markers, colored pencils or crayons they own, as long as they learn creativity.

I’ve learned is not about all these material things, it’s about their proper purpose, to help us move forward in learning the virtues necessary to gain heaven…..

Who knew? Who knew preparing for your typical garage sale would include so many life lessons.

Comments

Debs said…
I LOVE this post!

Popular Posts

Domo Arigato Gozaimasu Nihon - Thank You Japan

First, I apologize.  It's almost been a week since my last post, and life certainly has a way to take me over.  Arigato Gozaimasu - Thank You We have many commitments, many places where we have promised our time and energy, and when sickness sets in for me or anyone in our home, life pretty much stops....for little while anyway. Thankfully, the illnesses are down to minor colds, and as of yesterday, I am off the meds to treat a sinus infection.  But that's not all.  It's re-enrollment time at school, and every March we face the same uncertain future in debate...Can we swing yet another year's worth of financial commitment to our Catholic school, for four children. It's a stressful time, it's uncertain, and I have to say, that security is something I thrive on.  Any insecurity, and I tell you, life just isn't right.  With the children unaware of our finessing the budget, we work to keep that calm and peace that assures the children all will be well. 

Words Can Hurt

When we first started having children, like most people, we realized quickly how they often work as a mirror to our own actions. Letting a swear word slip here or there was not uncommon in our home, yet, when our first child was about 18 months or so, and hearing my swear word echo in the house for several days from her little lips, well, it was enough to curb my speech, dramatically. And now, swear words are never spoken in front of the children, and we have adopted a few more words that are unacceptable in the house, even though common place in the world. Just another example at how, as parents, we truly are the domestic church. The world may be on the path of negativity, but the home is where we make the difference. My four year old the other day, said, "I hate tomatoes!" Not the worst thing to hear from her mouth, granted, however, the word 'hate' bothers me a lot. 'Hate' is a very strong word, opposite of 'Love'. Think of how strong that word, 

Little Guys and Big Things

Sometimes, Veggie Tales stick with you. Even when an 8 year old seems too old for Veggie Tale stories, and reluctantly watches a few, the messages do stick.  Over the weekend, my Knight was to serve Mass.  For the past few Sundays he has been serving, and we keep reminding him of the various ways to show reverence while doing his duties.....a bow to the tabernacle, folding of the hands and so forth. Sunday, I happened to be watching Knight lather his gel in his hair to ready for Mass, and I once again, reminded him to keep his reverent ways about him while serving.  He made a distinct face at me, and said, "Ugh, Mom, those other server boys are bigger than me.  I don't want to do something they aren't doing." "I understand, but you could set the example, because you know, what you are doing is the right thing." He shook his head, looked at himself in the mirror, and seeing his own image reflected, said again, "I'm the youngest one there, Mom